FLORIDA – When the International Society for Krishna Consciousness was first incorporated in 1965, the Society consisted mostly of young men and women, but as its members grew older, the dynamics of the movement changed.

Many of the nation’s elderly live in nursing homes, enduring chronic pain and loneliness. Though the aged are greatly inconvenienced, they lack better options. This is where the devotee-fronted business Nursing Temple, Inc. comes in.

“Today, you will find only old folks here,” says the President Sad-Isvara das, 94. “Our scriptures advise us to care for our elders.”

While nondevotee nursing homes are fully staffed with trained nurses and doctors to tend to the round-the-clock care of the residents, Nursing Temple sees this as an affront to God.

“We prefer to depend soley upon Krishna, says Tyagini dasi, 69, Nursing Temple’s board president. “Why waste time on maintaining this body, which is nothing but a decaying bag of puss, stool and urine?”

West Coast Governing Body Commissioner, Drishtaketu dasa (102), said: “The youngest devotee in my zone joined 1979. He’s a rookie. I don’t trust those young whippersnappers. They don’t know what we had to go through in 1966.”

The activities at Nursing Temple are focused mainly around the grhastas. This has angered Rishi das, 86, the lone brahmacari in the community. “The grhastas never treat me as an equal. They think brahmacaris are immature and escapists.”

Though most of the relationships within Nursing Temple are blissful, not everyone has been able to cultivate friendly relationships in the temple community. “I’ve bickered with Pari since 1968, when he was leading the college preaching in Iowa,” said Maha Yudha das, 94. The 95 year old Pari replied: “Now you can see his mentality, he doesn’t even call me by my full name, Paritoshananda, although I am an older devotee.”

Sexism, too, is a common problem. A radical feminst group calling themselves “The Prabhus” wrote numerous letters of protest to the GBC. “We want to park our wheelchairs on the right-half of the temple room during the arotik, not in the back,” demanded Prabhus’s spokeswoman Bhima dasi, 87. Adding, “we know where they keep their Geritol!”

In the early days the society was accused of depriving its members of sleep and forcing them to overwork. “It’s true, we went through some rough times,” the president said, “we were young and inexperienced. Nowadays it’s completely different. We have several nap times throughout the day. Quiet hour starts at 6pm.”

Since even the management of Nursing Temple is elder, the question of who will replace them once they leave their bodies and go back home back to Godhead has been raised. “Ma suchah, do not fear. We are strict vegetarians. We have another decade or two before we will leave our bodies,” said the 94 year old Sad-Isvara. “Some have been saying that I should let the youngens take over. That’s hogwash. They can have my position when they pry it out of my cold, dead hands.”

Other senior disciples agreed. Drishtaketu added, “my GBC zone will collapse the day I give it up. They just need me. Sure, at 102, I am getting little older, but there’s still juice in me.”

Nursing Temple, Inc. is providing the aging vaisnavas a positive alternative to their kids throwing them in karmi-run nursing homes.

Tyangini agreed, “Karmi nursing homes are simply waiting rooms for the hellish planets. Come to Nursing Temple and take a nice long sponge bath in the mercy of Lord Mahaprabhu.”

Are strict sannyasa vows getting you down? Do you like the worship and prasad, but just can’t stand the commitment? Is retirement from the sannyasa ashrama on your horizon?

If so, then look no further.

The Bhaktivedanta Memorial Home for Retired Sannyasis is here to serve you!

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Life is good at The Bhaktivedanta Memorial Home for Retired Sannyasis… really good. We offer an excellent selection of amenities and services designed with the active lifestyle of a retired sannysasi in mind.

Your spacious bhajana kutir is available with living room/temple room, dining area and full kitchen. An extra bedroom is also available for a 24 hour personal servant.

Do you have a special diet? Here at Bhaktivedanta Memorial, we specialize in special diets! Can you only eat maha-prasadam? No problem! Do you take ekadasi prasadam every day? No problem! Or maybe you indulge in chocolate and the occasional cup of coffee? That’s no problem at all! We are here to serve you.

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And just to remember the good ol’ days, each year on your most holy appearance day, you’ll receive an extravagant vyasa-puja organized by our dedicated Worship Committee. And of course, the disciples who haven’t abandoned you are more than welcome to attend. You’ll even receive a commemorative Vyasa-puja Offerings Book, full of glorifications to you and you alone!

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