“It is fact,” said two-year adherent, bhakta Randal, “she is nicely following Vedic culture by getting the hell out of my way, otherwise, she is simply prostitute.” Adding, “Could you let her know that I think it’s really nice, that she gets the hell out of my way? Could you tell her that for me?”

Abhava devi dasi sustained slight abrasions and a bruise on her knee as she got the hell out of the way for His Holiness Matsarya das Goswami as they passed each other in the downstairs hallway near the lobby.

“She is so chaste,” reports Sri Danda das brahmacari, “just see how completely her head is covered. And how her eyes never quite make contact with yours.”

Another brahmacari questioned, “I wonder what color they are.”

One such event was witnessed by a family visiting the temple for the first time. “What was that about?” Asked Ron Browning, the father of the family of four, after seeing Abhava devi dasi trip over her own feet to get the hell out of the way near the washroom as several Hare Krishna monks wandered by. “That just doesn’t seem right.”

When questioned about his temple’s unspoken policy about brahmacarinis, Kamarupam Swami, temple commander and bhakta leader, disagreed that it was sexist.

“The idea that women are mistreated in the temple is completely bogus.” He continued, “outside the temple, they are practically trained to casually walk past so many men. Is that not abuse?”

Temple visitors are not the only ones talking about Abhava devi dasi’s behavior. Talk in the men’s ashrama has turned to discussing her actions as well.

“I really appreciate her dedication to Srila Prabhupada,” says Pradhana das, during the brahmacari ashrama’s Tuesday night Bhagavad-gita study group, “she gets the hell out of my way better than any mataji I’ve ever seen.”

“It’s true,” added life-long brahmacari, Devakanya das, “Have you ever noticed that even though Abhava’s long, brown hair sways back and forth, it never comes undone as she glides across the floor to the wall?”

“And how, when she casts herself to the wall as we move past, her sari nearly exposes her slender waist giving way to the soft curve of her hips,” said Menaka das, closing his eyes. “Even as she gets the hell out of my way, she remains such a nice, chaste mataji.”

Abhava devi dasi’s conduct has not gone unnoticed. “Most women do not understand how to act in front of men,” Kamarupam Swami said after a thoughtful pause. “Most women will casually stroll by, hardly noticing me at all. But when Abhava devi dasi gets the hell out of my way, I can fell her sincere concern for my spiritual life.”

When asked why he chose this particular quote Kamadeva replied, “It’s something that I think about a lot. Though I don’t normally come in contact with women, on the occasions that I do I can generally feel their lust towards me.” Adding, ” It must be a very hellish situation for the spirit souls trapped inside of them.”

Kamadeva was chanting japa in a pasture one day when he came across a cow who looked at him with a lust similar to what he had seen before in the eyes of a woman.

“Though I could feel lust emanating from the cow, it was not nearly to the degree that I had felt lust for me emanating from the woman I was preaching to the night before.” Kamadeva added, “I once again remembered this quote and now understood that there was some truth to it.”

The equipment that he used to conduct his experiment primarily consists of “an iron rod mounted with a button and attached to a box.”

“While I use this instrument I make sure to clear my mind and chant very purely,” Kamadeva explains. “The maha-mantra purifies my body of any subtle degrees of lust so that I can accurately get a measurement of the lust of things around me.”

The brahmacari then aims the rod at a person or object, presses the button and the meter shows how many cows worth of lust are present.

“It was not surprising to find women coming in at ten cows,” Kamadeva spoke of his research. “But there were some unsuspected results as well.”

Kamadeva’s experiment has found that inanimate objects also contain a greater degree of lust then first thought.

“Computers for example also have a very high rating of eight cows, probably because there are so many pictures of the sex-life inside them,” said Kamadeva.

Other objects with high lust counts include hot showers (seven cows) and grains cooked by karmis (eight cows). Kamadeva added, “these are definitely things I plan to research more thoroughly in the future.”

In conclusion Kamadeva explains, “As you can see, it is true that women are ten times lustier than cows, though karmi men, at four cows, are also very lusty. The good news is that even a new Bhakta shows evidence of lust decreasing, and with the advancement of becoming brahmacari, the lust is scaled down to practically nothing.”

Though Kamadeva’s research has not led him to the sastric origin of this particular saying, he asserts that hearing it from the mouth of an elevated soul during a Srimad Bhagavatam class indeed makes it bona fide.

“If I were to even talk to one woman, soon we would be having nice conversation and then, immediately there would be sexual relations, like that,” Krsnakarna said.

“It is not that I would want to fall down,” Krsnakarna said. “I myself, though the most fallen, only desire to serve Krishna. I am concerned for these poor matajis who are not as strong in their devotion as men.”

He added: “They may see me and become agitated, immediately casting off their saris to attract me.”

When asked who would be taking care of day-to-day errands such as banking and bhoga runs, where encounters with women are most likely to occur, Krsnakarna replied, “Yes, I will simply chant very nicely on beads, like that, and Krishna will arrange nicely.”

Krishna apparently arranged for Vrnda Devi, Krishnakarna’s wife, to take care of such things. She was spotted at the local grocery store, Wal-Mart and Jiffy-lube, juggling three children, two boys and a girl, who Krsnakarna has not spoken to since Ekadasi. When asked about the arrangement, Vrnda had no comment.

It has been rumored that she is no longer speaking to Krsnakarna.

Area matajis living in the temple had mixed reaction to Krsnakarna’s vow. “Does this mean he’s going to stop preaching to the college girls?” Asked temple commander Mother Yamuna, “There are a few brahmacaris who have already volunteered to take over this service. I would ask him myself, but…”

“I guess this means that he’ll be talking about sex even more when he gives class now,” newly converted Bhaktin Jennifer said, adding “What’s up with that? It’s kind of creepy.”

Since Ekadasi, Krsnakarna has avoided all women, speaking only to his wife. This is a radical departure from the accepted ISKCON practice of speaking to all women, except the wife.